the Shakedown: slang. "a thorough search of a place or person." (dictionary.com)

FYI

Sunday, May. 09, 2004 at 7:04 pm

Miguel and I went out again Friday night. Had a blast, as usual. Got some nooky. . . FINALLY. We didn't go "all the way" but it was enough for now. Took some pictures. Will probably post some tomorrow. No, not dirty pictures, you sickos. Just some of us together looking hot.

Oh and I kissed a girl in the back seat of Miguel's car Friday night too.

Miguel is coming over in a couple of hours tonight. I have some major gas going on too. I really hope it's out of my system by the time he gets here. I wonder if I just stopped eating completely if I would stop having damn gas all the time.



Straight eye of a formerly gay guy

Wednesday, May. 05, 2004 at 12:28 pm

Currently I have a male roommate who also happens to be my cousin, that would be J-MO. We grew up together, so it's cool. We've lived together for almost three years now. One thing is for sure, having a male roommate is much better than having a female roommate. More than two ovaries in one house is not usually a good thing.

Recently, J-MO and I were on the lookout for another male roommate to help with the bills. I have a four bedroom house with a finished basement, so we have plenty of room. My cousin had told me about a boy from our church who was looking for a new place to live. I'll call him Danny Boy.

Danny Boy used to be gay. And I mean "gay" as in homosexual. And I mean "used to" as in not anymore. It's a long and personal story, so I won't go into detail on that. But I will say that Danny Boy still has some rather feminine tendancies. This does not bother me at all. In fact, I have nothing against anyone who is homosexual. But more power to Danny Boy for trying to find his identity outside of his sexuality.

The point of my story is this: I've discovered the best part of having a formerly gay male roommate. Other than the fact that he is just a total sweetheart. When it comes to fashion and my appearance, I get a male and female opinion all in one.



I still have time for the little people

Tuesday, May. 04, 2004 at 11:12 am

Sorry I've been a bad girl about updating. You have my permission to spank me. It's partly due to laziness and partly due to busy-ness. You know how it goes.

So where did we leave off? Oh yes, Miguel. Friday night we went for sushi. It was the first time Miguel tried it as an adult. It was a success and afterwards Miguel told me, "From now on, whenever I eat sushi, it will have to be with you, P****." He calls me by my last name. I'm down like that, yo.

Then we went to this club where they were having salsa dancing. After a buttload of drinks we finally got out there and danced a little dirty and danced a little salsa. There was a hot Mexican chick that I dirty danced with a little too. Yum.

Miguel got too drunk and passed out as soon as we got to his house. I kissed him on the foreheard and went home. The next day I teased him about being a lightweight and about almost showing me his wing-wang when he was getting undressed! He's a good sport.

Saturday I got my picture taken for my real estate business cards and then did nothing else the rest of the day. Late Saturday night I talked to this other boy, who shall be called Robi, for about two hours on the phone. He asked me go to lunch with him on Sunday.

Sunday I went to lunch with Robi, but my mind kept wondering to Miguel. I think I'm going to have to cut Robi loose. I don't want to hurt him and it's not fair to string him along when all I do is think about Miguel. This is like only the second time in my entire life where I've actually wanted to be exclusive with someone (not that Miguel and I are even officially "dating" at this point). I feel like such a damn giddy school girl. Slap me.

Yesterday I had a bunch of meetings, including one with my psychologist. I always feel better and more relaxed after I talk to her. I brought up my concerns about raising my son without his biological father in the picture. She said that the fact that I'm conscious and concerned about being a single mother makes me a good mother. She also assured me that even one good, active male role model will replace the need my son may have for a father growing up. That comforts me a lot since my son has a handful of good, active male role models.

I'll be honest, it hurts me that my son's father wants nothing to do with my son. I don't want my son to ever feel sad or rejected because of this, but I know at some point, we will have to deal with it. My son's father has never once asked how his son is doing, let alone recognition on birthdays or holidays.

The icing on the cake? This past weekend, he informed me that he wants to have some sort of "legal document" releasing him of all legal obligations to my son. The fucker doesn't even pay child support and I haven't asked for a penny in over two years. He can totally suck my balls. One of my girlfriends said I should wait until my son is 18 and then sue him for all the back child support. I think that's pretty hilarious, but I don't know if I could honestly go thru with it. Some things just aren't worth it.

But regardless, my life rocks and my son's life rocks. I have a wonderful support system of loving family and friends. What more could a girl want? Well, maybe a little nooky from Miguel next weekend.



"If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." C.S. Lewis