the Shakedown: slang. "a thorough search of a place or person." (dictionary.com)
Happily Single - so where's my holiday?
Friday, Feb. 06, 2004 at 1:07 pm
With the upcoming gag-inducing V-day, I thought it appropriate that I post an old entry from my previous diary about singleness. Everything in our society pushes us towards and celebrates "coupleness." So in my usual rebelious fashion, here are some of my thoughts on why being single is good, regardless of the fact that society has us thinking otherwise.
Originally posted 02.09.2003 - Why can't I find a friend who is single, not dating anyone and not constantly searching for someone? 
I actually like being single, but I seem to be the only one in this hemisphere that does. Of course I check out guys whenever I'm out, but I'm not constantly thinking about why I'm not dating someone or how my life would be better if I only had a man. Whenever any of my friends have been single (which is rare, because they tend to go directly from one man to the next), they are a bore to be around. They're always complaining about not having a man or missing that feeling of lust/love. But then, here's the stupid part, when they do have a boyfriend all they do is complain about what assholes their men are. No wonder we women have a reputation for complaining all the damn time.
I'm not saying love is not worthy of all this comotion. I think wanting to give and get love is a fundemental human need. I think without love, any kind of love not just romantic love, a person's life is very sad and lonely. I guess I've been lucky because I have a family that loves me and shows it. And I've been in love, I know how wonderful it can feel at times. I also understand the desire to have a lifelong companion. I do want that. Someday.
What I am saying, however, is that my life does not revolve around dating. That is what bothers me. When someone can not be happy or feel good about themselves unless they are dating someone. I hate seeing my friends waste their time, energy and love on people that they know damn well they are not going to spend the rest of their lives with. Why is it, that so many people would rather settle for some half-ass excuse for a partner to fill in their holidays and weekends than wait patiently, and singlely, for the right one?
Why not enjoy getting to know yourself and finding what really makes you happy in life? OTHER THAN being with someone else. Why not spend your weekends pampering yourself rather than being depressed because your boyfriend is out with his friends instead of at home pampering you? Why not take a road trip to see a long distance friend rather than driving around town running errands for your boyfriend? Why not get involved in that art class/softball league/book club that you've always wanted to by yourself rather than going to watch your boyfriend play in his weekend pool league?
I'm just saying that I enjoy being by myself. I enjoy doing what makes me happy rather than relying on someone else to do it for me. I don't feel depressed or angry about the fact that I don't have a boyfriend. Yes, I want to fall in love again someday. Yes, I enjoy having a boyfriend. But not just any guy. Not just the first guy who shows the slightest bit of interest in me. And in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy what I've got. It sounds so simple, yet it's a foreign language to everyone I know.
Got morals?
Wednesday, Feb. 04, 2004 at 12:38 pm
Why is it that I seem to always find myself apologizing for taking some sort of moral or ethical stance? I've been told that I come across as condescending and holier-than-thou. I feel bad about that. I don't want to alienate people, and I know that's what those kinds of attitudes do. I find myself between a rock and fucking cement block. Am I supposed to just keep my opinions to myself all the time for fear of pissing off someone who doesn't want their immoral or unethical behavior called out?
I do believe that you get more out of life by being positive and encouraging rather than critical and judgmental, much more. But doesn't there come a point when we all get fed up with someone's behavior and we feel compelled to say something? And would you not be a true friend if you didn't call out your friends when they are behaving like idiots?
Don't get me wrong, I do believe there is a time and place for everything. And I also believe that it's pointless to point out the obvious. Most people know when they are acting inappropriately, whether they are willing to admit it or not. It's not my job to get people to admit their shortcomings. That is just ridiculous. But I think it is my responsibility to society and to my loved ones to express concern over things they may be doing to hurt themselves or other people. Don't we all have a responsibility to each other as the human race to strive for a better society? I mean, if aren't looking out for each other, then who will?
Oh wait, I forgot I'm living in the "It's all about ME!" era. Never mind.
Shock and awwwwwe that's nasty!
Tuesday, Feb. 03, 2004 at 3:08 pm
Can someone please tell me how worldly famous, filthy rich, abnormally beautiful, adored by millions, people can still be so desperate for attention? If those people aren't satisfied then I guess it's no wonder that your Average Jane and Joe are seeking attention by harming, destroying, humiliating, maiming, and killing. I�m not shocked or offended, nor do I really even care. But I suppose I care enough to say, "That�s just nasty." Have some fucking class already, would ya? And that goes for everyone.