the Shakedown: slang. "a thorough search of a place or person." (dictionary.com)
To poop or not to poop: that is the question!
Friday, Sept. 19, 2003 at 3:36 pm
My friend Kat mentioned that it is normal to have 4 to 5 poops a day. Needless to say, I was quite shocked by this little tidbit of information. I always assumed once a day was normal, not sure why. I just got that stuck in my head somewhere along the way. So anyway, this got me curious enough to do a little research of my own. Partly because it was actually bugging me and partly because I think it would be fun to prove Kat wrong. Hehe! Love ya Kat!
Anycrap, this is what I found. If you guys find anything else, please post the link in my comments.
Stools that are eliminated from the body at least once every one to three days.
"Normal" can mean anything from three bowel movements a day to three a week.
Anything from three times a day to three times a week is normal.
Freaky Friday Sex Story
Friday, Sept. 19, 2003 at 12:01 pm
Occassionally I enjoy a good sex story. And I just happen to have a friend who enjoys writing them for me. Enjoy!
WARNING: Reading the following paragraph may cause instant orgasm.
We step into the shower, feeling the water splashing over us. I stand behind you, and slowly begin to soap your back... moving down to glide the suds over your smooth round ass. You lean back into me, and feel my cock pressing into you, erect and hard. Your hand reaches around and grasps it, slowly stroking it as you feel the pulses within. My hands slide around to your stomach, softly teasing it as they slide lower, between your legs, cupping the soft outline of your pussy. My fingers slowly spread your lips, and you feel a spasm as they softly tease your clit. I begin to slide my cock up and down your ass, and you can feel it opening your cheeks as it moves inward. I then lean you over, your hands on the wall as I reach under, parting your lips and sliding my cock into your tight pussy. The head spreads your lips, and you gasp as you feel it slowly penetrate deep inside of you, pressing eagerly into your wetness. I begin to slowly make deep strokes, pulling out, then all the way back in. My hands cup your breasts, twisting your nipples lightly, harder as our arousal reaches higher. I then suddenly pull it out, and turning you around I kneel in front of you, lifting your leg up in the side of the tub, burying my tongue in your soft flesh. You feel it spear into your cunt, searching for the clit and frantically kissing your soft lips. Your hands balance you on the walls as you feel my fingers penetrate you as I suck on your pussy... pulling the lips into my mouth, teasing your clit until you are close to cumming. I then stand up, and you kneel, taking my stiff cock in your hand, kissing the head. You then slip it into your mouth, gliding it deep against your throat as you suck on it. I begin to slowly pump it in and out, your hands caressing my balls as its slips in and out. I cant stand it any more, and we dry off quickly, heading for the bed. I lay you on your stomach, and begin to finger your hot wet pussy from behind, kissing your ass as i do so. I then lift you to all fours, and spreading your legs, plunge my throbbing cock deep into your quivering pussy. I begin fucking you faster and faster, as you feel my balls slapping on you, your hand between your legs frantically rubbing your clit as I fuck you so deep and hard. My finger then creeps slowly between your asscheeks, and softly enters your tight anus, lightly at first, then firmer as we begin to reach climax. I slip it in up to my second knuckle, and you gasp as your orgasm overtakes you, intensified by the ass play. I begin to cum as well, pulling my cock out so you can feel the warm cum splash over you.
Come be my partner in crime
Thursday, Sept. 18, 2003 at 10:42 am
Does anyone want to help me with Talking Anus? I haven't updated it in FOREVER, but I really want to keep it going. If you enjoy reading diaries and blogs and are always reading something you'd like to quote, then this could be the job for you! Please email me if you're interested. Serious inquiries only please!
You think I'm gross now?... you have no idea
Thursday, Sept. 18, 2003 at 10:16 am
I'm thinking about starting a diary that is password protected where I can talk about all the really gross stuff in total graphic detail without worrying about grossing people out. I'm talkin' periods, poop, diarhea, boogers, sex, and other bodily fluidish issues. Would anyone actually want to read it?
Oh and be sure to leave your email in the comments, so I can send you the link.
I have a need to possess things
Wednesday, Sept. 17, 2003 at 10:07 am
Those of you who have been with me for a while will remember several months ago I was debating on whether or not to purchase some new furniture, only problem being I'd have to go further into debt to do it. Well, for a while, I was like, no absolutely not. Then one day I found myself at a furniture store and broke down. I couldn't stand it any longer, I needed new furniture, the power of the new fabric smells compelled me and overwhelmed me. I fell victim to the shopaholic that lies within me. So here you have it, folks. A picture of new and sexy loveseat (the couch looks exactly the same, only, uh, bigger) because I am such a proud owner. My loveseat, couch, and I all hit it off right away. I think I'm going to let them stay.
Also, new pictures have been added here, here, and here for your viewing pleh-shah!
I'm a mutha fuckin P. I. M. P.
Wednesday, Sept. 17, 2003 at 2:27 am
Sometimes I'm so pimpish, it hurts.
Funniest/nicest thing said to me today, well yesterday, or sometime around midnight anyway: Help me Ang, hell me be a pimp. I think I'm going to rename myself the Jedi Master of Pimpology.
Second nicest thing said to me lately: You have the face of an angel.
Third nicest thing said to me lately: When I'm with you, I forget about all my problems.
Yes, hello? Angela's Giant Inflated Head, party of one please.
And tomorrow I will discuss why some vegetarians are retarded. Thank you and goodnight.
Sometimes I amaze myself
Monday, Sept. 15, 2003 at 1:40 pm
What am I saying? I always amaze myself. I love me. I want to marry me and kiss me and have sex with me. Man, it must really suck for people who aren't me.
Today Bob asked me: Why do I like getting laid so much?
My reply: Because you are a young, hot, sexual being with raging hormones. Because it feels fucking good to have a big dick inside your little vagina. Because sex is fun. Because boyfriend sex gets old and so we, as women, are finally starting to realize the value of being single and fucking anyone we want to anytime we want to. You are stupid and deserve to be buttfucked for asking such a stupid fucking question.